Typically we look at religion as a building block or even the glue for a relationship. Looking at the short story “Goodbye, Columbus” by Philip Roth, and the film “Keeping the Faith” directed by Edward Norton, a new understanding of religious relationships is made. Goodbye, Columbus’ love interests and main characters are Neil and Brenda, both are Jewish but the difference in their lifestyles seems to give them different definitions of what it means to truly be Jewish. In “Keeping the Faith” the love interests and main characters are Jake and Anna, Jake being a Rabi, and Ana seemingly having no connection to religion sparks major differences between the two of them. Both the text and film show the struggle and triumph between characters trying to be together despite differences in their religious backgrounds. Anna and Brenda share similarities in fitting into the role of being considered the outsider within their religion. Jake and Neil are left to defend their relationships against those who acknowledge the difference in commitment to being Jewish between them and their partners. And finally, with the weight of so many reasons to stay together, there were so many more reasons for these relationships to fall apart outweighing those. Different levels of commitment to faith/religion cause inequalities and tension within relationships that are connected with faith.

Anna and Brenda share similarities in fitting into the role of being considered an outsider in their religion. For example, in the film, there is a scene where Jake and Anna go on a movie date. They bump into people who are from Jake’s congregation, Anna then shares the movie they were planning on seeing. The movie she shares with them is one they wouldn’t expect their Rabi to see, leaving all of them in an awkward situation. Jake’s solution for this was to completely ditch their original plan, and save face by seeing the movie the people from his congregation were on their way to see. Jake’s actions show his lack of comfort with Anna. Though Anna is willing to throw herself into this religion for Jake, it’s clear that this effort or desire from her isn’t enough for him. Jake’s decision to switch movies made Anna upset because he wasn’t sticking by her and the decision they had made together because the approval of his congregation got in between the two of them. Another example, in the text Neil is having a conversation with Brenda’s father. Brenda’s father said, “‘You know more than my kids. They’re goyim, my kids, that’s how much they understand.’”(Roth 47). “Goyim” is slang used by Jewish people, it’s a term they use for a non-Jewish person. From the conversation these two were having, Brenda’s father was alienating her from the Jewish community. A simple use of slang goes a long way for a girl who is already not seen as Jewish by other people. Though the fault essentially falls on her father for this, he’s not oblivious to the fact that culturally and even religiously Brenda isn’t seen as Jewish. These views from these situations and conversations from the text and film exclude these two women from the groups of Jewish people but put them in a group together for outsiders.

Jake and Neil are left to defend their relationships against those who acknowledge the difference in commitment to being Jewish between them and their partners. In either relationship, outsiders have things to say about Anna and Brenda which may be true, but Jake and Neil still defend them. For example, in the film Jake gets “exposed” for being with a non-Jewish woman, which as a Rabi wasn’t typical and in the eyes of his leaders not okay. In a scene from the film, Jake speaks in front of his whole congregation and defends himself, his relationship, and his love for Anna. Everyone in the congregation knew Anna wasn’t Jewish, and Jake had to be the one to stand up for her and against those who were opposing their relationship because no one else would the way he could. He knew her and their relationship best, and he was the one person who people would turn to when they thought of religion in their relationship. This left him being the one to defend things when religion got brought into the conversation. Another example, Neil was on his way to stay with Brenda for a little while for vacation and he had a conversation with his aunt about it and she couldn’t believe what he had said. “Since when do Jewish people live in Short Hills? They couldn’t be real Jews believe me.’ ‘They’re real Jews,’ I said. ‘I’ll see it I’ll believe it.’”(Roth 58) From Neil’s aunts’ assumptions and knowledge of Jewish people in her own life, she couldn’t believe a Jewish person could be well off and live in a nice neighborhood like that. As a woman who lived on top of a supermarket, hearing a Jewish person had their own house, and money like Brenda’s family it was hard to believe, or even put together. Neil knew Brenda and her family, knowing they were Jewish even if it didn’t seem like they were. Neil had the privilege to be able to defend them, even though his aunt wasn’t buying it at all. Since it is common knowledge for these two men to be religious and in relationships with women in the question of being religious, their words will always be heard by their girlfriends even if their words are left being questioned.

With the weight of so many reasons to stay together, there were so many more reasons outweighing these relationships to fall apart. There were many ups in these relationships, these characters loved and cared for each other, and they wanted to be together despite everything and every reason they had had to not be together. After the many arguments, there were many makeups as well. But with that, the bad started to make them forget about the good that they had together. For example, in the film Jake and Anna had a huge fight about the exceptions the synagogue had on Jake and the expectations Anna’s corporate job had on her. They lived two very different lives at different paces and it was catching up to the somewhat fairy tale of a life they were living for the past few weeks. They went back and forth about how different they were and in the heat of the moment they broke up out of anger. In this moment of anger, the bad outweighed the good, there was no room for the love, the caring, and the reason to stay together to shine through. Another example is during Brenda’s relationship with Neil she got a diaphragm at his request. When she left for college she had left it home for her mother to find in her room, knowing this would end the relationship between her and Neil. They argued over the phone about this decision Brenda had made. Neil knew deep down that she intentionally did this, but Neil still ended up at her college after all of this. Though he ended up there, he left all alone. “I did not look very much longer, but took a train that got me into Newark just as the sun was rising on the first day of the Jewish New Year.” (Roth 136) With Brenda intentionally leaving her diaphragm behind she knew this would leave Neil behind as well. With all of this happening, it made sense for Neil to enter the Jewish New Year alone, rather than being with someone whom he really wouldn’t even be sharing it with. It all came down to the differences in lifestyles these characters had, it pushed them away from each other rather than bringing them and their relationships back together.

Religion can bring a lot of things to the table for people, typically it brings people together. Looking at “Goodbye Columbus” and “Keeping the Faith” it’s clear that religion wasn’t something that could bring these relationships together. Bringing two complex aspects of life together, relationships and religion results in complex outcomes. Something as strong and binding as religion, created similarities for the two relationships looked at throughout this paper. These similarities are struggles, arguments, breakups, and even judgment, things not expected to come from religion. When different levels of commitment to faith/ religion from people come together, they cause inequalities and tension within their relationships that are connected with the faith that they either hold or lack.